hello i'm notjustaprettyface
I have started Uni this year and I am totally loving it, but am finding living in halls with complete stangers a pain in the bum, I live in a flat with 5 girls, the girl on the right is incredibly noisy for such a small person, especially when her boyfriend stays for the weekend, the girl on the left is usually pretty quiet, but tonight is playing her music really loud and has friends over, shes turned the bass right up and its giving me a right headache, but im all cosy in my pjs and I hate confrontation so... the girl opposite is great weve become friends and are moving into a house together next year, along with my group of friends, who are actually all boys, so it'll be 6 boys and 2 girls living in a huge house next year, i cant wait, i love those guys so much, met them all this year but theyre all great, the last girl only moved in a week or two ago and stays in her room and smokes all the time.
*sigh*
I guess i'm a bit stressed at the moment, i have 2 assignments due in for next week, and I havent done them, i'm feeling really down, tired and unmotivated at the moment, so I am feeling it really difficult, but it's the last week next week then I go home for christmas, which i am really excited about, I cant wait, on the first Monday back were all going to have a reunion and go out to the Monday rock night like we used to, im so excited.
Im not really sure how to write stuff on here, can i name names? I guess i can use first names...
Well today I woke up just after lunchtime, then have been browsing YouTube, watching videos on there (its really addictive) there is some really good representation, there is a few really good ones which are like thinspiration or whatever, I really wish I could be so thin and so beautiful, i'm not as bad as i used to be, i think it's because i hang around boys, but when I see my friends from back home who are all girls, I compare myself to them, and that makes me feel terrible, fat and ugly, so i guess in that respect i'm not looking forward to going home, but i am really.
There was a ball tonight, a Christmas do, I didnt go because I feel so down, I dont even know why. There was also a few other parties, but I really dont feel like going out at the moment, i just sat in my room and watched tv and binged on biscuits that i dont even really like.
I was going to go to bed at a reasonable hour to try and get plenty of sleep, so i can get loads done tomorrow, but sleeps going to be impossible, with the racket Caras making, grr, its really pissing me off now.
I also have alot running around my mind, the assignments, going home for Christmas, my friends, the future, boys- I am single, and always have been, I have never had a real boyfriend, i know what a looser right? whatever, so yeah a couple of weeks ago, i ending up snogging this guy at a club and we exchanged numbers blablabla, anyway we organised a date but i couldnt go, so organised another and he couldnt go, which i think puts us on even ground, then we organise to meet up again, and he says he couldnt go again, so im like, go figure, so i havent bothered texting back, if would like to go out he can sort it, which is a pity, he was really cute, when he said he couldnt make it to the last one we were supposed to meet at a club, i was already there with my friends, so i just got really drunk and did something a bit silly, i snogged this guy on my course who i know likes me, i dont find him at all attractive, but he was actually a good kisser :S lol anyhow, i was drunk, i know he fancies the pants off me, but now i kind of regret it and feel bad for him, because i'm going to see him in seminars and stuff, the thing is i sort of like him, as well, because he likes me so much, i'm going to play the drunk cant remember card, and hopefully that can wipe the slate clean, i hope, because im not saying no to him, forever, just no- now.
gawd i feel stressed out and i cant seem to find a way to unwind, im wound right up.
Another thing is, my and my friends have put a deposit down on a house for next year, which is great, but i found out about the house, by looking around it with a group of girls who i was supposed to be moving in with, but there was bitchyness and rivalry already in the group, so i kind of looked round it with my other friends and put a deposit down first, basically i screwed them over, but i still get the house, the problem is these girls are my only other 'girl' friends i have and theyre on my course, so i want to stay friends with them but i still havent told them im moving into the house without them, oops.
Okay her music is really loud, and im all scrunchy, eee, i need a bath or a massage, or something, relax relax, ouch its actually painful, im going to attempt to sleep now, it's been nice talking to you, goodnight.
Love Love xx
